hello,
i hope this finds you well. speaking of hope, today i woke up full of hope. this isn’t something that happens sporadically but the amount of hope that was rushing within me just felt.. idk new. maybe this was related to the new season that’s finally approaching us but, still new nonetheless.
the sun is starting to come out more consistently again and i find it so beautiful to see new york full of smiles and joy. god, how much i’ve missed sprawling out on some grass and just basking in the warmth of the sun (which is exactly what i did today during my break). i saw so many people carrying bouquets of flowers today, probably to commemorate and showcase the beauty of spring that we are all starting to feel. i should honestly probably do the same.
shifts between seasons feel exactly like that, a shift. the shift into fall from summer feels like slowing down, fall into winter feels like the need to hibernate, but for some reason the shift into spring from winter just feels so lively and hopeful. my friend Elaine and i were texting this morning about a plethora of things (how i want to get into olives, how much we loathe energy vampires, and the beauty of enjoying life for what you have rather than want). while we were texting, she commemorated this feeling of hope i had today so beautifully, as she usually does.
“Spring Equinox grants us the opportunity to plant the seeds of the things we want in life and tend to our garden of desires everyday.”
isn’t that just beautiful. like, it’s right on the nose of how i felt this morning. thank you Elaine. if you want to hear what today was like for me, it felt like this song. god. gladys knight’s voice just sounds so warm to me.
today i also finished Raymond Carver’s Elephant and Other Stories (1988), which is Carver’s final seven short stories he wrote before passing of lung cancer the same year of its release. for those of you who aren’t familiar, Carver is a short story writer who writes about topics such as abuse, longing, alcoholism, love, turmoil, and all things that make us human. he’s also one of my favorites. i’ve read pretty much all of his collections and was finally able to read this one. i’ve been reading this book on the computer at work via internet archive. below lays a quote from one of the stories within the book named ‘Elephant”, which is obviously the title. this quote also sort of showcases this feeling of hope i woke up with today so it’s ironic that i read this today.
“When all was said and done, I decided things could be a lot worse. Just now, of course, things were hard for everyone. People’s luck had gone south on them was all. But things were bound to change soon. Things would pick up in the fall maybe. There was lots to hope for.” -Raymond Carver
in other news, i have a fun few days lined up for me after tonight. well, actually, tonight will be fun too. when i get off, i’m gonna meet up w some of my friends at the bar to play pool and twirl in circles and hopefully my friend Illiana who just got in today will be joining. as for the next few days: i’m getting a new tattoo tomorrow (not surprising), have some fun tattoos planned to do on friday, and hanging with my friend Lana visiting from austin on saturday morning and some more friend’s from upstate that evening. im getting giddy just thinking about the smiles and laughs that will definitely be occurring soon hehe.
on monday night, Alora (my best friend, muse, roommate, and overall perfect person) and i watched Gregg Araki’s Nowhere (1997) along with a couple of her friends who were in town for a little. i had seen that movie before but this time i connected more to it. the color grading, the soundtrack, and the clothes just tied the movie together beautifully. also all of their peculiar ass name feels like stepping foot into bushwick. (Egg, Handjob, Cowboy, Dingbat, and Ducky to name a few.) for anyone who may be wondering, my favorite Araki movie is Smiley Face (2007). 1. because i f-cking love Anna Faris and 2. i can see something far fetched like that totally happening to me.
yesterday i ordered a new pair of harleys that get in on friday and i am sooooooo excited. new boot for the summer is loading asffff. i got them on ebay and lowballed the seller a fuckton so i was actually surprised my offer was accepted but it’s times like that where i remember that i’m anointed.
ok that feels like everything i need to get off my chest right now but it won’t be the last you hear of me.
to wrap up everything: hope and love is in the air, my weekend will be great, i rewatched Nowhere, i got a new pair of boots, i love raymond carver, and as per usual (i say this because i say it so much), i am surrounded by such an amazing group of people who shower me with love and wisdom constantly.
ok bye bye. love u all.
-jonatan